When we are young the answer to this question is very simple. Every child seems to know what they want to be when they grow up, and I was no different. I knew I wanted to be a doctor, a lawyer, a mom, and a teacher. I made the choice to become a high school English teacher before I ever walked through the door of my own high school. I KNEW that was what I wanted to be. I KNEW I would be dang good at it too. And I am, and I do love it. However, more and more, as I contemplate the road I want to take, I honestly have NO CLUE what it is that I want to be when I grow up.
I have been on this teacher track for so long that the thought of being anything else is really frightening and exciting. Don't get me wrong. I am still looking for a teaching job. I am still hoping to find something, but more and more I feel as if I need to prepare myself for that horrible and likely chance that I won't find a job again. Then more than ever I will need to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.
Nick and I have talked about this extensively. As we think about having a family soon (let's face it, I'm getting old--and NO, this isn't an announcement) we played with the idea of me staying home for about a minute...then Nick said, "Don't you feel as if that would be a waste of your education?" Good one, babe. After being really taken aback at that one, I realized that I spent my whole life thinking that exact thing. And now I don't? Good grief! What is happening to me?
So, what do I want to be when I grow up? A high school English teacher? A school librarian? An administrator? A SAHM? The next American Idol? I just don't know!
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2 comments:
I say "Idol"! I would be your absolutely #1 fan! Ok...#2...Nick can be first.
All I know is that the search for who you are and who you want to be is pretty darn exciting...and scary...but pretty darn exciting.
I also know that you are so amazing that you will excel at every single thing you try...you have the world at your fingertips and you can do anything....really and truly...anything.
I do think your feelings about SAHMs are funny...when I first met you, that was one of the first things you talked about. Now, not so sure, huh? That is okay. You will be an amazing mom...whether there is a SAH in front or not.
Love ya!
Ah, stay at home mom. I had no idea what SAHM was, and I thought you had mis-typed SHAM and I was like Jen you are NOT a SHAM! hahaha
YOU ARE SO THE NEXT AMERICAN IDOL!
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