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Spring in Colorado is usually my favorite. I love the rain. The green. The flowers. The sticky seedlings. Gardens. Even the inevitable Spring snow--heavy and wet. This Spring has brought with it some really terrible days, however. And not just terrible for me. Terrible for us all.

You may have heard that the entire Denver Metro area schools shut down. So many students stayed home one day due to a threat--a woman, believed to be obsessed with the Columbine massacre that happened twenty years ago, came to Denver, bought a gun and disappeared into the foothills. Unsure where to find her, every district, including the one my children attend, shut down until the threat could be eradicated. Since then, school after school after school after school has experienced a threat of one kind or another until the worst happened, and one student died while lunging for the gunmen, allowing his fellow students to get to safety. Eight were injured. Too many babies were terrified.

And the world needs answers. Answers as to why this continues to happen. Answers as to how we fix it. Answers as to how we keep sending our kids out into the world when the world is so frightening. I am a member of a Mom's group on Facebook, and I am very proud of this group. The women lift one another up. They support and offer advice when asked. They offer a safe space for perfect strangers to vent, share, ask for help, and cry. In the last few days, I have watched these brave, strong mamma's crumble. They question how they can send their kids to school. They wonder who has the answers. They argue about gun control, mental health, and parenting. Things are falling apart with no sign of stopping. The world is a hard place. There are things we cannot control, and my heart is heavy. Heavy as I contemplate how to help and what can be done. And I return to the same place every time: home.

"Parents, whatever you are doing, return home." (Cook, Gene L. "Home and Family: A Divine Eternal Pattern" Ensign May 1984)

It is so important for our kids to have a safe and stable home. It is our job, as a mother and/or father, to create a safe place for our kids. A place where they feel accepted. A place they can return to no matter what. A place their friends are welcome. A place their friend's parents are welcome. It is important to know your kid's friends. And their parents. It is important to know where your kids go. It is essential to have dinner together whenever possible. It is important to have family time. Game nights. Movie nights. Hard and awkward conversations need to take place over and over and over again. Our kids need to know they are loved and accepted. Boys and girls alike need to be taught and shown how to express their feelings and know that their feelings are valid and important. More than knowing that bullying is wrong, our kids need strong examples of what it means to be a friend.

Tragedies strike and people rush to hug their babies a little tighter for a few days, but please don't stop. Be an example. Be nosy. Be a strong, positive influence. I promise your kids will hate you, but someday they will thank you. 

Seasons

The kids are obsessed with the timing of the seasons. They want to know exactly when one season slides into the next, and I think it is fascinating that they notice those things in their lives. I do not recall being aware of the beginning of seasons growing up. I mean, we live in Colorado, and I was lucky enough to grow up here, so I experienced then and experience now all four seasons (however short Spring may appear). My children experience all four seasons, and I cannot imagine living in a place where four seasons do not present themselves for our enjoyment.

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So, here we are, three days into Spring, and I can already feel a shift. Will we see more snow? Yep. It is coming this week even, but for the last three days, I have watched my kids spend more and more time outdoors. They are itching to play in the grass and run and ride bikes. They twirl in the sun and fall to the ground winded and happy. We talk about summer plans: camping and swimming and Friday nights at the Bay. We plan for summer activities and can't wait to spend the mornings running through the sprinkler. Spring is fresh. Lovely. Hopeful. Beautiful.

I am itching to plant something. Even though I kill plants on a regular basis. I want to purge the house. Paint rooms. Redecorate. Hang new pictures. Create. Paint. Make things beautiful.

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The neighbors are outside. Voices float through open windows. Dogs are out again. Popcorn (our neighbor's cat) scavenges once again.

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We are planning hikes and day trips and days to go have lunch with Daddy. The light is longer. The kids are pushing that bedtime clock already. Showers are dirtier. The kids fall into bed satisfyingly exhausted after a good day.

I love this time of year.   

Writing

I miss writing on a regular basis. I really do. The pull to write hugs me, and sometimes suffocates me until I MUST. DO. SOMETHING. ABOUT. IT.

Like now.

I have felt the need to write for well over a year now. My goals last year included being able to write daily--even if only for a few minutes--but let me tell you where that got me. Not writing.

I can make excuses all day. Little kids. Volunteering at the kid's school. Working a part-time job for a while. I allowed all these things to keep me from writing. So, once again, this year I made a goal to write. Not daily. Just more than I did last year. So, in two more blog posts, I will have accomplished that! Ha!

Honestly, I have big goals when it comes to writing. I would love to make a career out of it. I think I am fairly talented, but like anything, if I am out of practice...the writing will stink.

I thought I would pick up my YA novel I have been plugging away at for the last few years and FINISH!

Alas, not yet. I need the practice. So, here I am. Practicing. On the good ole family blog.

I figure this is a safe space. A really safe space for my to get my chops back. Share some things. Make some things up. Have an opinion. Heaven knows I never express that. (Insert eye roll and listen for my mother's snort.)

So, for now: welcome to my writing space.

Forever,

Jen