Shame on me!

You know the saying, "Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me." Well, guess what?! I have been a fool. I have been blinded by my own desires. I have been sitting here knowing that something is going on, and I have worked very hard to convince myself that this is not happening. Oh, what a silly, silly little girl I have been!
Something very real is going on...he is a big, fat liar and a cheater. That is what has been going on. No more excuses for him. No more reasons for me to pretend this might be fixable. And where is he while I am agonizing and crying like a stupid girl. On a weekend getaway with a friend. I wish I could believe that.
So, to those of you who have stood by my side while secretly wishing I would just walk away from this, you will get your wish. To those of you who have been particularly vocal about the kind of person you think he is, you were apparently right. To those of you who want to smack me for being so nice, go ahead. It can't hurt more than this does.
That is the worst part...I am in actual physical pain right now. My chest hurts, my head is throbbing, my muscles are tight and tense, and I am having trouble breathing. And, all I can think STILL is, why is this happening?!