When you are--a-hem--(long pause) (uncomfortable silence)...(whispers) fat.

I am going to guess that you have seen this article floating around the Internets by now. (I myself have had many people share it on their Facebook page.) But, in case you have not, here it is: Everything You Know About Obesity is Wrong.

This title either intrigues you, or does not, likely depending on whether you yourself are obese, love someone who categorizes as obese, or health and nutrition are your passion or your job.

I fall into the category of All Of The Above.

I am a student of my own body and my own struggle, and for some reason, likely all selfish in nature, I feel the desire to share some of my story and my struggle.

Let me warn those people who are reading this and who love me: some of the things I share here may anger you. And let me state that I know I am not alone in what I am about to share. Okay, disclaimers over...

Articles like these will HOPEFULLY help the medical world better understand the science of losing weight. Or not losing weight. Or just understand that sometimes, being obese does not equate to being sick all the time. I have had the most interesting conversations happen AROUND me while visiting the doctor. And other things said to me that were so insulting, I was stunned to silence. And here we go:

1. How much did you weigh as a senior in high school? (180) Oh, you were a big girl!
2. Doctor to student observing my appointment: Would you rather have an obese pregnant patient who is relatively healthy or a patient who is pregnant but suffers from -------? Student: An obese healthy patient. Doctor: Right, and we are lucky to be working with one of those today.
3. Nurse to me after birth of my son: You know you probably won't see your milk come in any time soon because of the obesity thing, right? (For the record, it came in within 36 hours).

Articles like these will never help with Fat Shaming--because those who fat shame don't care why you are fat, just that you are and they don't think you should be. So, those who say,

1. When did they start letting fat girls in here?
2. It is such a good thing you are funny and fun.
3. Every guy should date a fat girl, they do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to please you. They are just so grateful!

JUST STOP SAYING THOSE THINGS! THEY ARE HORRIBLE.

Articles like these sometimes allow me to better understand my body, so I have the ability to push away things that have been said that I don't think were meant to hurt, but did.

1. Don't cut your hair short. It will make you look bigger.
2. I am surprised that Nick likes you so much because I thought he liked smaller girls.
3. Your body could look so good, Jen.

Look, I loved this article. I read every word that reaffirmed to me that what I have long suspected to be true is, in fact, true. I don't love how I look. I have stopped looking in full length mirrors for longer than a few seconds to make sure my clothes are on correctly. I have been smaller than I am now, but at my smallest in the last 15 years, I was spending crazy amounts of money and working out with a personal trainer two or three times a week. I worked, went to the gym, and ate next to nothing. And people LOVED me at that weight. My confidence was sky high, but I ran out of money and took a month off from training with my trainer, and GAINED TEN POUNDS. Still eating next to nothing. Still working out daily. One month. Ten pounds.

So, do I need to learn more about my body and how it works? I do! I know I could benefit from meeting with a real and actual dietitian/nutritionist. Guys, we probably all can. Mostly, I just think this world needs a little more love and a lot more understanding. And read the article. It is long, but it is fascinating. 

The Reading

Okay.I love to read, and I am so excited to have been introduced to the wonderful Bookstagram community on Instagram this past year. It is no secret that I am involved with a few book clubs: one with my mom and sisters that is embarking on our fourth year of reading and monthly chats via Google Hangout about our selection for the month. You guys. This family book club is one of my favorite things ever, and I highly recommend that you start one with your family. Then, I am also involved with a book club with my girlfriends from church which is as much a social club as it is a book club, and SOMETIMES we even discuss the book for the month.

I mention these because I hope to come on here and review the books I get to read each month with these ladies! Hopefully, I will get me act together and read my goal for the year (which is what should be an easy 30 books, BUT...you know, life).

The books I had the privilege of reading this month were, The Music Shop by Rachel Joyce and Wonder by R.J. Palacio. I loved them both, but for different reasons, so let me dive in a little here.

Pic from Goodreads

The Music Shop was the pick for the Mahan Girl's Book Club this month, and while I struggled to get into the book initially, once I got further into the story, I rather enjoyed it. The secondary characters are my favorite part! They are a motley crew of misfits who find one another and care for one another as their world both literally and figuratively falls apart around them. The music shop where Frank operates and Ilse appears, is the home for their wants, desires, aches, pains, and especially their love. Frank, who had a mother who couldn't love him any way except through music, has a talent for finding just the right song for his customers. His obsession with vinyl is making his shop and his philosophies less and less relevant as everyone is converting to CD's. He makes many efforts to save his store and his people only to have it all fall apart on the same day he runs from the mysterious Ilse--who first fainted in front of the shop and flits in and out before asking Frank to teach her all he knows about music. The ending of this book is wonderful, and I would very much recommend that you read it.

http://78.media.tumblr.com/926bd038bc265027b0469305ed8a40f9/tumblr_ovev3ndkUI1rrf01io1_1280.png

Wonder by R.J. Palacio is the story of August Pullman who is about to go to middle school--well, any school for the first time. Auggie has a facial deformity that has a very technical medical name and very technical descriptions of why he was born this way, but I will let you read it. He is a great kid who has much to overcome and manages to make some really great friends along the way. I read this on my own in a day. It moves super fast, and I could not put it down. This is a book that I look forward to reading with my kids as they get older. This one is my first FIVE STAR read of the year, and I highly recommend reading it!

If you are so inclined, follow momma_reads_alot on Instagram for all things literary related in my life!