31 Day Blog Challenge: 20 Facts About Me

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Okay, Holly and Lisa (and my mom via email) have posted some really wonderful and amusing things about themselves. The pressure is on to make this good! So, here I go:

1. My family jokingly call me "The Expert" which I actually love. I like to think it is because I am so wise, but I think the real reason is because I am fairly good at finding and interpreting information. I love being able to help others by finding out things and passing on info, and I do tend to voice my opinion (although it may not always be wanted).

2. I always wanted to get married and have a family, but I honestly never thought it would happen. I was hopelessly in love with at least a dozen wrong-for-me guys over the years, and through that experience, I had come to the conclusion that I was not marriage material.

3. I believe in love at first sight--okay, maybe second sight. The second time I met Nick, I KNEW my life would never be the same. I just didn't know how that would play out! Here we are, five years, many adventures, and almost two kids later. Still love him more than anything!

4. I am a slob. I can clean, I will clean, but oh how I hate it!

5. I play the clarinet (probably not well anymore), the piano (not real well, I am mostly self-taught), and I could be the next American Idol. :-) Not really, but I do love to sing.

6. I always knew I would love being a mom, but I didn't realize how much until Q came into my life. This mom stuff is pretty cool, and our worst day here is WAY better than the best day I ever had as a teacher.

7. I believe that education is one of the most important things we can do for ourselves and our children.

8. I absolutely LOVE having five siblings. My best friends were built into my family, and I can hardly believe how BLESSED I am to have the family that I do.

9. I used to think that I was smart. Now, I think I have more to learn than will be possible in this lifetime.

10. While I have not always been the greatest example, I am LDS. These past few years, as I have come back to church and grown in the Gospel, I have come to find a great peace with who I am. This is a blessing beyond compare.

11. I always jump to the worst case scenario when presented with new problems and challenges, and I generally assume that is exactly what is going to happen.

12. I love to try and plan my life, and everything in it, but these past few years especially, have taught me that planning is futile and I should really just work towards being prepared and staying flexible.

13. I experienced one of my worst nightmares when I had Q, and I lived to tell about it.

14. I have been told several times in the past few months how strong I am...I don't know about that, but I do  know that I am determined. Incredibly determined.

15. I am a crier. I try not to be, but I do cry at the drop of a hat. I cry almost daily these days. Let's blame the pregnancy!

16. I am really excited to be having another baby girl join our family. It isn't a secret that I am actually terrified at the thought of having a son. It isn't a rational fear, and I do kind of hope we can have a boy one day, but for whatever reason, I am afraid to be a mother to a son.

17. Speaking of irrational fears: I am absolutely terrified of dinosaurs. Not bones in museums or displays, but scary dinosaurs in movies. Jurassic Park is a movie I have never seen all the way through. My sisters thought it would be funny one time to surprise me at Dave and Buster's with the Jurassic Park video game. This is also how Nick found out about my fear of dinos...they put me in the game with my eyes closed, handed me the gun and started it. Instead of jumping out, I thought I should actually try and kill the dinosaurs running towards me. So, I part screamed, part laughed, part cried through the game while Nick sat next to me with his ears covered and muttered, "Are you kidding me?" over and over again. He stuck around after that, but seriously...dinosaurs are really scary!

18. My favorite movie of all time is Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. It makes me giggle.

19. I love to read. I wish I had more time to read. I love so many books from so many genres that one might think it would be hard to pick a favorite, but I actually never, ever tire of reading The Great Gatsby. I literally have read this book over 30 times, and read it again at least once a year since I have stopped teaching. I would happily teach the book for anyone, anytime!

20. I prefer cold weather to hot, mountains to ocean, dry air to humid, and the smell of rain calms me and makes me happy.

31 Day Blog Challenge: Introduction

So, my sister Lisa challenged those of us sisters who blog to do this challenge together. I am always in for things like this. I think it is fun to reflect on these things sometimes, and I think it is an interesting way to get to know others. There are some of the days that I might change things slightly. Like Day 3: Business Name? I don't think I quite understand that one.
Anyway, there are many ways in which introduction can be interpreted. I have introduced the challenge, so I actually could stop there, but what is the fun in that? So, here is a little intro about Jen.
I am 32 and live in Colorado. I love Colorado. I was born here, raised here, and then I left for a few years to live in Texas with my hubby since his job was located there. We are back in Colorado, and that makes me happy. I feel more like myself here. I never really could in Texas. I have four sisters, one brother, a sister-in-law, and three brothers-in-law...all whom I love dearly! My sisters and I are particularly close, and although we are geographically spread out, we are able to maintain a wonderful relationship. My brother lives close, and I am blessed to have him and his wife just across town! They are so good to us and especially my daughter, Q! I have been married for a little over three years, and we are expecting baby girl #2 in August. I have a BA in English, an MA in Education, and I taught high school for five years. Loved it. Miss it sometimes. Love my job now more! I am a Stay at Home Mom currently, although I am looking for a job. It has become necessary, so if anyone has a lead...
I promise to be brutally honest in these posts as the days go on. Things might get interesting, so hold on to your hats, ladies and gents! Welcome to the ride!

If you are interested, here are the links to read about my sisters too! They are fascinating people. :-)

The Guzman Family Lisa's Blog
The Griffith Family Stef's Blog
The Glem Family Holly's Blog

Kelli, Stef, Holly, Lisa and Me
Taken a few years ago! 

30 Down, 10 To Go

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So, I have been dwelling on this a little bit. Thirty weeks. This was honestly the turning point in my pregnancy with Q. Thirty weeks with her fell right around Thanksgiving. My family was with us in TX, and I really felt off the entire weekend. I thought it was really just the craziness of the weekend, everyone around, and lots of work putting Thanksgiving together. As it turns out, this week marked the beginning of what became a frightening, wonderful adventure. I looked at pictures from the weekend and noticed that I was looking rather swollen...especially in my face. I thought it was just normal swelling. It honestly wasn't excessive. I was tired, but I spent my entire pregnancy feeling extremely tired! I could hardly finish one small chore without needing a nap! A few weeks later, we were in KC with Nick's dad and stepmom for a great weekend of family and football. Pictures of me there showed off my excessively swollen face and my boots were tight. A week later, we were in the hospital praying my blood pressure would be control-able. No such luck, so we had a baby. Such a little baby! Healthy, happy, so beautiful...and so early. 

This pregnancy has been completely different. I keep reminding myself of that, but I am still nervous. I take my blood pressure all the time. I still have to deal with being slightly anemic and I have to take my glucose test again this week, but those are nothing compared to what we had to do before. So, I will continue to monitor and assess how I feel daily, and I will pray that we really have ten weeks left. Or, at least nine! 

Thank You...

As many of you know, Nick is not here with us right now. He is in Texas. This past weekend, Q and I were able to fly down and see him. It was time that we all needed, and every second was precious. The highlights of my weekend though came in the simplest ways: my husband saying "Thank You." He thanked us profusely for making the trip, but the two that meant the most to me were as follows:

After visiting on Saturday, he called me and said, "I feel like I need to thank you for being a good mom. Our daughter is so well-behaved, and so beautiful, and so smart, and I know that this is all because of you." I still don't have words to describe what it means to me to have him say that.

While visiting on Sunday, he said that he really needed to thank me for coming all the way down to Texas. Those of you who know me, know that this trip was really not that big an undertaking...in fact, I booked it, packed up and went because I wanted to and needed to and why wouldn't I? He continued to apologize for taking my independence for granted...still confused. But then he said that my coming was apparently amazing to other people because they didn't know any women who would have taken the trip. So, he thanked me for just being me and for being strong. What can you say to that except, You Are Welcome.

I have never felt as if Nick doesn't appreciate me for me or accept me for who I am. He loves my strengths and patiently deals with my weaknesses. I am lucky. Yes, I am a lucky girl.

Count Your Many Blessings

WHEN UPON LIFE'S BILLOWS YOU ARE TEMPEST TOSSED.
 Today I am struggling, and I am not exactly sure I am strong enough to make it through this time in my life.
WHEN YOU ARE DISCOURAGED THINKING ALL IS LOST.
I am tired. I am angry and hurt and incredibly scared.
COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS NAME THEM ONE BY ONE, AND IT WILL SURPRISE YOU WHAT THE LORD HAS DONE.

ARE YOU EVER BURDENED WITH A LOAD OF CARE?
I am completely overwhelmed with the things I have to do and plan for and think about these days. I am never sure what day it is or how I will make it through the week.
DOES THE CROSS SEEM HEAVY YOU ARE CALLED TO BEAR?
I worry about our house, our finances, our marriage, our daughter, and the one on the way. I worry about my health and the safety and well-being of my husband.
COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS; EVERY DOUBT WILL FLY, AND YOU WILL BE SINGING AS THE DAYS GO BY.

WHEN YOU LOOK AT OTHERS WITH THEIR LANDS AND GOLD.
I feel as if others are afraid to tell me about the good happening in their lives because life is rough right now. However, I feel exactly the opposite. Please don't cut me out of your happy life! I need reasons to celebrate, and I am always happy for other people.
THINK THAT CHRIST HAS PROMISED YOU HIS WEALTH UNTOLD.
Although, my sarcastic attitude is more along the lines of, "I better be storing up heavenly blessings." Probably not the proper attitude. I should work on that.
COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS; MONEY CANNOT BUY YOUR REWARD IN HEAVEN NOR YOUR HOME ON HIGH.

SO AMID THE CONFLICT, WHETHER GREAT OR SMALL
Note: this is the hardest thing I have ever done. In fact, it is so big and so hard that I am often terrified for what the rest of my life has to offer. We are on this earth to be tested, and I assume that those tests will only become harder and harder, which frightens me to no end.
DO NOT BE DISCOURAGED, GOD IS OVER ALL
Does anyone else ever think, "Are you kidding me?" Not being discouraged has got to be the most ridiculous request. Although, I don't think that is exactly the point. Just as we are meant to feel pain and loss and failure, we are meant to feel discouraged. I like to think that the point is not to live in Discouragement Land.
COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS; ANGELS WILL ATTEND, HELP AND COMFORT GIVE YOU TO YOUR JOURNEY'S END.

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS; NAME THEM ONE BY ONE. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS SEE WHAT GOD HATH DONE.COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS; NAME THEM ONE BY ONE. COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS SEE WHAT GOD HATH DONE.

1. Quincy: she is without a doubt the single biggest blessing in my life. Without her, I would not have a reason to get up in the morning or smile throughout the day. My Father in Heaven knew exactly what he was doing when he blessed me with her amazing spirit.

2. Believe it or not, being back in Colorado (even though Nick is in Texas right now) is a blessing. It doesn't always feel that way, but to have family close is a blessing.

3. Tessa: for those of you who don't know, this is the name of our next daughter. I often wonder why now--amid turmoil and havoc--is the time for her to come and join our family, but I have faith that she is all part of the plan. Not necessarily my plan, but a greater plan. She is proving already to be as great a blessing as her sister. 

4. A home: while I often question how long we will be able to stay here, I am so grateful for this roof over our head and the neighbors we have here. 

5. My sisters: without whom I would be lost. They listen to me cry and cry with me. They allow me to fall apart when I need to, which feels like a daily occurrence lately. 

6. My brother and sister-in-law: who come and rescue me when I need them!

7. My mother-in-law: who does more for us than I think she knows, along with the rest of her family who are making my life easier and slightly less stressful whenever they can. 

8. My father-in-law: who is a great support to his son.

9. Friends: who have supported me without judgement, let me fall apart, say the wrong things, be awkward and angry, and listen to my ramblings as needed. 

10. Church: this is a community of people who, whether they know the details of my life or not, have welcomed us home with open arms and help us time and time again.

11. Nick: who loves me. Who loves his daughter(s). Who is struggling with his own struggles and still only worries about us. Who is my best friend. Who I love more deeply than I ever thought possible. Who will return to us with honor, and who I choose to stand by. 

The text I used comes from a hymn, Count Your Blessings. Click on the link for the music and words. 

All My Life

Let's just say that there was a 90's sing-a-long, and someone might have confessed that this one made him miss his wife a lot. Let's just say that I love that side of him.

Married Three Years

I have been thinking over and over again all day what to post or whether to post something on the blog today. I just can't let an anniversary go by without sharing something about how I am truly blessed by the man in my life. I feel as if I have had many, many conversations lately about how marriage isn't always sunshine and roses. It is work. It is hard work. It makes me ache when people jump in and out of it so quickly without really giving it a chance.
I watched my best friend get married this last weekend in Hawaii (post to come later), and I was so happy and so proud of the decision she made to marry the man she loves so dearly. It brought on so many emotions about my own wedding day. Our ceremony wasn't on the beach or in a church or at a Vegas wedding chapel--we simply went to the courthouse. Eleven people joined us during the judge's lunch hour when he agreed to take time out of his day to marry us. It was everything I ever wanted. I stood across from the man I loved so fiercely and repeated the sweetest vows, then exchanged rings and kissed him for the first time as husband and wife. Life since then has been a roller coaster of emotions. A bag of sweet success mixed with bitter failures, and I wouldn't trade a second of it for all the gold in the world.
I think that people want to romanticize marriage as this THING that fixes all the complexities of a relationship. It doesn't. Marriage doesn't fix people. It doesn't change people. The issues people have when they aren't married are the same that arise when they are. Often times, I think being married adds complexities to the relationship--it doesn't take them away. But it is worth it. Every second is worth it. Every fight, every argument, every hug, kiss and embrace...all worth it.
I fight every day for this marriage I am a part of. I fight to keep my family together, to keep us afloat. I am not a saint. I am a wife and a mother. I don't fight alone. My love fights with me, and sometimes that fight means that he fights for his life in order to create a better one for us. For this, I love him.
Today has been a hard day. No one wants to spend their anniversary apart, but as it is necessary right now, we soldier on and pray for a better one next year.

Our Wedding Day May 1, 2009

First Anniversary 2010

Bringing home Quincy January 2011